Saturday, September 1, 2012

Incest in the bible (Oh my god)


We can find incest in the bible.

 Q. Yes way? No way.

 A. Yes way.

To me incest is one of the most, if not the most insidious crime that can be committed by any man, or woman. To steal the youth of your own child should be punished by the heaviest sentence that can be imagined. The person responsible for such an action should never be allowed to walk the streets again in his or her life. No child asks to be born and no child should be treated in this manner by a member of his own family. A child should always be allowed to play and to grow up in as a normal manner as can be in order to become a well balanced adult who will have a productive and fulfilled life.

In this article I’ll mention three cases of incest that are present in the bible. One of them is quite obvious and the roles are inverted. You’ll see as to what I mean. The second is also obvious but blind-faith believers don’t dare ask questions about it. They just accept it as they accept everything else in that fairytale book. The third instance is very subtle and when you analyze it closely you detect the same treachery and misguidance that are forever present from cover to cover.

Let us start with Lot and his two daughters. After the fires of Sodom and Gomorrah Lot was left alone with his two girls following the transformation of his wife into a salt pillar because she dared watch the two cities burn. In the bible it says that the daughters waited for their father to fall asleep, after drinking, in order to have sex with him because they believed that they were the only people left on hearth and wanted to continue the human race. To the women who are reading this I ask; have you ever tried to get a drunken man, let alone a dead drunk, to reach an erection good enough for penetration? It’s simply, physically, impossible. It won’t happen. No way. What’s really happened was that Lot screwed his own daughters knowing damn well as to what he was doing but as it’s so often done everywhere in the bible, blame has sadly been put on women.

As a second case I wish to ask you readers a question that many crhistians have probably asked themselves before. Who was the mother of Adam and Eve’s grand children? To any person of average intelligence, the answer jumps to our eyes, Eve, as asking the question is also answering it.  But again blind-faith believers either don’t see it or simply choose not to admit it. This case is what I call: god sponsored and christian approved incest.

The last instance that I want to treat isn’t complicated and is complicated at the same time and requires a good analytic disposition in order to properly identify it. I’ve never seen this situation treated anywhere and for many of you, believers it will become clear after it’s properly explained to you.

In the gospel according to Matthew, chapter 1, verse 20, it is said: The angel of the lord appeared to him in a dream, saying: “Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the holy ghost.”

If you’re a blind-faith believer as all Christians are, you gobble the bible explanation without blinking an eye and you don’t find the situation complicated. Where it becomes complicated to you is when you read my explanation and your head then becomes all screwed-up.

As a growing boy, at a time when my young friends and I were intelligently and skillfully being indoctrinated and programmed to become faithful and generous financial contributors to the catholic business, sorry church, I remember very well the teaching nuns in school and the priest in church telling us that the father, the son and the holy ghost, united, were but ONE GOD. Does that ring a bell inside of your head? No? It should because it means exactly what it says. It means that Jesus impregnated his own mother, simple as that. But in order to clearly understand it you must be able to deeply reflect on what I’ve just written. Unfortunately, blind faith has sadly taken away your reflecting capability. This example is also god sponsored and christian approved incest.

In other words, incest, for all of its ugliness and disgusting moral properties is present and I might add, almost recommended, in this so-called; holy book.

 
What do you think?

 
© 2012 Jean-Paul Gosselin

 
Whether you agree with or have an objection to my blog, leave a comment. I’m open to favorable or unfavorable criticism and what you write might enlighten other readers or myself.

Thank you.

 
Take this with you.

An elderly man is stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and is asked where he is going at this time of night.

The man replies, "I am on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."

The officer then asks, "Really? Who is giving that lecture at this time of night?"

The man replies, "That would be my wife."

Don't take life too seriously..........no one makes it out alive anyway!!!

Have a swell day, stay relaxed, have a beer and don’t forget: keep smiling. Life is good. Buena la vida. La vie est belle.

Sunday, July 1, 2012

Brassiere straps. Hum. (Ugly, ugly, ugly.)


Brassiere straps can ruin your looks.

 Q. Yes way? No way?

 A. Yes way.  

Most women want and work hard to look good, and why not? A woman who looks good will invariably attract looks and perhaps pleasant commentaries from the people that she will come across on the street and it’s quite all right. Without purposely wanting to charm, women, in general, feel good when they look attractive, at least I would if I were a woman.

It’s summertime here in the north (Canada) and everyone likes to wear light clothes and to take as much sun as possible. Winter is so long and cold that is a great feeling to shed those winter clothes off for summer ones and to feel the warmth of the sun on your skin. I find the sensation so good that, to me, it’s like a rebirth.

It’s also the time at which girls run to the store and stock up on summer clothes. Shots, sandals, summer dresses and light tops, nothing is forgotten.

Between choosing as to what clothes that they’re going to wear and time spent in front of the mirror, making up their faces, some women easily spend one hour and perhaps more. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

Once they believe that everything is in its right place, they’ll finally point their noses outside the door and let people admire them and I’m one who loves to do that. But when I see a woman in a summer dress with spaghetti type straps and I can see, underneath those, two ugly brassiere straps, my jaw simply drops. Brassiere straps is the last, but the last, thing that I wants to look at when I admire a woman and I have no reason to believe that I’m the only person to think that way, man or woman. Girls, yes you girls who have the very bad habit of doing that, for forty dollars buy a strapless brassiere and instantly improve your looks.

Am I in a bitching mood today? No, not really, I’m not but this is something that’s bothered my ass for many, many years and I simply thought that today would be a good day to let you know about my concern.

While I’m at it I’d like to recommend another suggestion about your dressing habits. I can see you telling yourself: “Boy there he goes again.” But you’re going to love me for it, I know. I know that you will. You’re all aware of that damn peace of material that tells you as to how to wash your garment and to, or not to, iron it. Well, where does the manufacturer sew it? Right at the back top of the piece of clothing that you so proudly wear and, as if by magic, it always manages to stand up and out, in view of everyone. Cut the bloody thing out with a pair of scissors. After you’ve seen it once, you never, ever, look at it anymore but, being a leg and bum man, I see it and I guaranty you, it’s ugly. This was my bitch for the day and now I feel good.

What do you think?

© 2012 Jean-Paul Gosselin


Whether you agree with or have an objection to my blog, leave a comment. I’m open to favorable or unfavorable criticism and what you write might enlighten other readers or myself.

Thank you.


Take this with you.

The local TV station was interviewing an eighty year old lady who was had just married for the forth time.

The interviewer asked her as to her new husband’s occupation.

“He’s a funeral director,” she answered.

He then asked her if she would mind telling the viewers a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living.

She paused and with a smile on her face she proudly explained that she had first married a banker in her twenties, and then a circus ringmaster in her forties, followed by a preacher in her sixties and now, a funeral director.

The interviewer looked at her, quite astonished, and asked as to why she had married four men of such diverse careers.

The old lady smiled and explained: “I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready and four to go.”


Have a swell day, stay relaxed, have a beer and don’t forget: keep smiling. Life is good. Buena la vida. La vie est belle.

 


Friday, June 1, 2012

IQ, UQ. (What the hell, let’s all Q.)


IQ tests determine the level of a person’s intelligence.

Q. Yes way? No way?

A. No way


For many years I’ve heard people affirm that IQ tests determine the degree of human intelligenceand that all a person has to do in order to find out as to how smart he/she is, is to take one of those test. I started to seriously look into those so-called intelligence determining tests and the answer isn’t quite that simple.

Borrowed from encyclopedia Wikipedia is the following: Modern mental testing began in France in the nineteenth century. It contributed to separating mental retardation from mental illness and reducing the neglect, torture, and ridicule heaped on both groups.

Mental illness is a deeply rooted disease that can, in no way, be compared to mental retardation. A person suffering from mental illness is a person who sadly lives his life surrounded by a bubble, completely detached from the rest of society. That person has absolutely no knowledge of the conventions of social living as normal people do and therefore can only function in it with a great deal of difficulty, if at all.

Mental retardation, on the other hand, only means that a person lacks knowledge. For example an illiterate is definitely a retarded individual but that, by no means, suggest that that person isn’t intelligent.

When IQ test were first introduced into society, by the French, in the nineteenth century women were, more or less, tagged to have between twelve and seventeen children, once they married. Yes ladies that was normal for the era. Don’t you feel lucky today with one or two? Anyways, a situation like that implied that one or two of the oldest girls were designated to help the mother in the running of the household.

On their side a couple of the older boys were also chosen to help their dad on the farm or, if they lived in the city, to get a job and to bring additional money for the well being of the entire family. Going to school for three or four years or none at all only meant that those children were socially retarded but it certainly didn’t mean that they were less intelligent.

After taking a few of those IQ test for the fun of it, it becomes quite evident to anyone that they are all mostly based on knowledge rather than on the facility and ability with which someone uses his/her intelligence in order to find the answer to precise situations or in an incentive manner.

It’s a fact which, the designers of those tests seem to ignore, that intelligence simply can’t be compared to knowledge and can’t be measured using a test on knowledge. And I don’t believe either that it can be measured in numbers but rather in levels similar to the following example.

Intelligence levels.

Superior

Above average

Average

Below average

Inferior

This being said, don’t imagine for a moment that people of inferior and below average levels can’t be very nice, gentle and loving individuals and, on the other hand, that those with above average and superior levels of intelligence can’t be jackasses and rude to anyone whom they believe are not on their level. The degree of compassion that one person can show to another is usually acquired through that person’s upbringing although some individuals are capable of learning it by themselves.

What do you think?

© 2012 Jean-Paul Gosselin

Whether you agree with or have an objection to my blog, leave a comment. I’m open to favorable or unfavorable criticism and what you write might enlighten other readers or myself.

Thank you.

Take this with you.

A guy and a girl meet at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl's place.

A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands.

He then takes of his trousers and washes his hands again.

The girl has been watching him and says, "You must be a dentist."

The guy, surprised, says "Yes! How did you figure that out?"

"Easy," she replied, "you keep washing your hands."

After they had had sex, the girl says, "You must be a good dentist."

The guy, with a boosted ego says, "Sure, I'm a good dentist, How did you figure that out?"

"Didn't feel a thing!"



Have a swell day, stay relaxed, have a beer and don’t forget: keep smiling. Life is good. Buena la vida. La vie est belle.




 

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Now I'll x-ray your mouth. (Thanks, but no thanks.)


X-rays can cause cancer.

                                                           Q. Yes way? No way?

A. Yes, yes way.


To those of you who have read my blog articles titled: “Clean your house”, “Open the window” and “Cancer prevention” you know that I have a deep aversion toward chemical products in the home or in the human body. Honestly I haven’t trusted x-rays either for a long part of my life and for the same reasons.

When I retired from the military I had to have a medical check-up which was the routine for any potential retiree. On that day I happened to be the last patient to see the doctor and asked her if we could talk. “Surely, what’s on your mind? Was her answer. To my question as to what she thought about x-rays she replied: “One x-ray is one x-ray too many”. “Wow”, was my reaction. An answer like this coming from the mouth of a doctor left its mark on my mind and since I’ve retired, although I have a yearly medical check-up, I’ve told my doctor that I would go for chest x-ray only every three years, to which she agreed.

Some fifteen or twenty years ago I went the dentist in order to have my teeth cleaned. At one point the assistant told me to follow her. I asked her why and she told me that it was to take an x-ray of my mouth. When I answered: “No way, and by the way, why do you need to do that in order to clean my teeth?”, she and the dentist looked at each other and shrugged their shoulders as if I came from another planet. I said to myself let them think what they want, I’m the one to decide if I’ll look after myself or not.

You see friends, being a dentist also means being in business and, in order to have a successful one, sales must be good and must also increase every year. But I’ll be damned if their sales are going to increase at risking my health.

The reason that I’m writing on this subject today is because of a study results that were recently published in the newspaper. That study was done at the school of medicine at Yale in New Haven, Connecticut between the years 2006 and 2011 and comprised 1433 patients. It was clearly established during that study that because of regular (yearly) mouth x-rays, some people could develop cancerous brain tumors. 

If that’s not clear enough for you, it is for me. If you don’t want to end up with cancer, stay away from x-rays as much as possible, be the master of your body, decide by yourself as to what goes or doesn’t go into your body. You’ll die a happier person.

What do you think?

© 2012 Jean-Paul Gosselin


Whether you agree with or have an objection to my blog, leave a comment. I’m open to favorable or unfavorable criticism and what you write might enlighten other readers or myself.

Thank you.


Take this with you.

A guy walked into a bar in Alabama and ordered a white wine. Everybody sitting around the bar looked up, expecting to see some pitiful Yankee.

The bartender looked up and said, "You ain't from around here, are ya? Where ya from, boy?"

The guy said, "I'm from Iowa."

The bartender asked, "What the heck you do in Iowa?"

The guy responded, "I'm a taxidermist."

The bartender asked, "Now just what the heck is a taxidermist?"

The guy said nervously, "I mount animals."

The bartender grinned and shouted out to the whole bar, "It's okay boys, he's one of us! "

Have a swell day, stay relaxed, have a beer and don’t forget: keep smiling. Life is good. Buena la vida. La vie est belle.


Sunday, April 1, 2012

Push my camel. (But push evenly.)


Moses lived forty years in the desert.

 Q. Yes way? No way?

 A. No way.

Amongst all of the fantastic stories that are found in the bible one tells the reader that Moses took with him six hundred thousand people into the desert with him. Let alone the parting of the Red sea, which in itself is quite a feat, it’s said that they spent forty years in there.

In reality it’s written that he took six hundred thousand people and a multitude. In anyone’s book a multitude could have been one, two, ten or and additional six hundred thousand people. Who knows? Added to that statement, it’s says that: Neither had they prepared for themselves any victual and that they spent forty years roaming around in that desert. For any person believing that story and knowing the shorter human lifespan in those days, it means that thousands of individuals were born while many thousands died there. Where are the bones? Archeologists haven’t found any to this day.

Knowing very well that if a man decides to cross the Sinai desert from Egypt to Palestine without bringing a required supply of food and water that he’ll be dead in one week to ten days. How could that story be possible in anyone’s mind?

That’s where well planned child indoctrination or programming, if you wish, comes into line. As a small child we all loved that someone told us the story of Snow White or Cinderella and believed them up to a certain age at which time we realized that it was impossible for them to be true.

The stories in the bible are very comparable, in fantasy, to those that were told us in our youth and, what I find very difficult to understand is: How is it possible that so many adults of supposedly average intelligence still believe them. How is it possible that so many adults haven’t outgrown their need for such unbelievable stories? I can only imagine that for certain people their life has to contain a certain amount of fantasy for them to be happy.

© 2012 Jean-Paul Gosselin

What do you think?


Whether you agree with or have an objection to my blog, leave a comment. I’m open to favorable or unfavorable criticism and what you write might enlighten other readers or myself.

Thank you.


Take this with you.

Martian landing in the 1970s.

Two Martians land in the middle of the night in a closed gas station. They get out of their space ship. The Martians walked up to a gas pump. One said to the other ," I think these are earth people".
"Take me to your leader!" said the first Martian. No response.
The second Martian whispered to his partner, "I don't think we should screw with this one".
The first Martian said "Take me to your leader or I’m going to blow you to kingdom come!" No response.
With that, the first Martian took out his laser gun and zapped the gas pump. It blew up and so did the gas station and the Martians were thrown into the air and landed in a tree.
The second Martian said to the other, "I TOLD YOU, WE SHOULDN"T HAVE SCREWED AROUND WITH A GUY WHO CAN HANG HIS PENIS IN HIS EAR!"

Have a swell day, stay relaxed, have a beer and don’t forget: keep smiling. Life is good. Buena la vida. La vie est belle.










Thursday, March 1, 2012

The deluge. (there just isn't enough water.

The deluge really happened.

Q. Yes way. No way.

A. No way.

The text that follows is an extract from an unpublished manuscript called: “The legend of Jesus “, © 2008 by Jean-Paul Gosselin.

 The deluge

I suppose that the majority of people has learned, in its young years, about the principle of rainmaking and understands its functioning. Water evaporates from the earth’s oceans,lakes and rivers into the atmosphere thereby forming clouds of water vapor which, after sufficient cooling, is then transformed into water, showering the earth with rain. This cycle has faithfully, although not identically or uniformly, been repeated through the history of the earth.

The bible tells us that god informed Noah that as much rain would fall on earth as the tallest mountain is high, plus fifteen cubits. A cubit is an ancient unit of measurement
equivalent to the length of a man’s arm taken from his elbow to the tip of his longest, or in this case, the middle finger. After averaging the length of a few measurements we find that the final figure that was then generally adopted is twenty inches and the tallest mountain on earth we also know is Everest.

Mount Everest, it’s been determined, culminates at twenty-nine thousand and twenty-nine feet above sea level. If we add fifteen cubits or twenty-five feet to its height we arrive at a total of twenty-nine thousand and fifty-four feet. Dividing this last amount by forty, which is the length of time in days that we are told that it rained, we can then establish that seven hundred and twenty-six feet deep of water fell each day that the deluge lasted. In order to find out as to how much rain fell during each hour we have to divide this figure by twenty-four hours and we are left starring at the unbelievable amount of thirty feet or, if you wish, six inches per minute..

You see, Pauline, it’s naturally and mathematically impossible for two feet of water to fall to earth when only one foot has evaporated from it and, even if the god of the bible had completely drained the earth of its water and returned it in the form of rain, that rain would simply have filled the cavities left empty by the evaporation, without causing any inundation. Where then has he taken the required extra water from? Certainly not from outer space because it’s been proven that there’s none on the moon and that it’s only present in micro and perhaps nano-quantities on Mars and probably on the other planets as compared to the volume found on earth.

Has the deluge really happened or is it just another story invented by whomever wrote the old testament portion of the bible and that the catholic (Christian) church uses in order to show the power of its invisible god?

It’s for you to judge Pauline.


What do you think?


Whether you agree with or have an objection to my blog, leave a comment. I’m open to favorable or unfavorable criticism and what you write might enlighten other readers or myself.

Thank you.


Take this with you.

It was a sunny Saturday morning on the course and I was beginning my pre-shot routine,

visualizing my upcoming shot, when a voice came over the clubhouse loudspeaker.

"Would the gentleman on the woman's tee back up to the men's tee please!!"

I was still deep in my routine, seemingly impervious to the interruption.

Again the announcement, "Would the MAN on the WOMEN'S tee kindly back up to the men's tee."

I simply ignored the guy and kept concentrating, when once more, the man yelled:

"Would the man on the woman's tee back up to the men's tee, PLEASE!

I finally stopped, turned, looked through the clubhouse window directly at the person with the microphone and shouted back,

"Would the person in the clubhouse kindly shut up and let me play my second shot?"

 
Have a swell day, stay relaxed, have a beer and don’t forget; keep smiling. Life is good. Buena la vida. La vie est belle.








Wednesday, February 1, 2012

I’m an atheist. (Dedicated to practicing jews, christians and muslims.)

I’m a weird person because I’m an atheist.

Q. Yes? No way?

A. No way.

If I eat too much I become fat, just like you. If I bleed, my blood is red, just like yours. If I cut myself it hurts me, as it does you. If I loose someone whom I love, I’m sad just as you are. If someone whom I love becomes a dope-head, I’m concerned, just as you are. If I stupidly talk on the telephone or text while driving my car, I become liable to have a deadly accident, just as you do. If I have sex, I enjoy it just as you do. As you can easily judge, you and I are very alike human beings.

As a child I was indoctrinated and programmed by my parents and the catholic church, just as you were in your environment, and I’ve read the bible just as you have read the torah or the koran and understand what is said in that book just as you do. So, what the hell is the fundamental difference between you and I?

The difference is that you’ve read it and that I’ve read and analyzed it. I’ve indeed scrutinized every element of every anecdote and sub-story that is written in the bible. I’ve dissected every feat claimed in that book and have come to the only possible conclusion that could be reached after such work. The stories are basically written in a manner as to make you (children included) believe that a wonderful after-life truly exists in some place called heaven and to scare the shit out of you (burning hell) if you don’t. Anyone who believes whatever claim that is made in either of those books will believe that the big bad wolf did, indeed, blow down two of the three little pigs houses and that Cinderella’s carriage was really transformed into a pumpkin. Those books simply amount to a veritable similarity with children’s books. No less and no more!

Ludvig Holberg, (1684-1754), said what I’m trying to say in a better manner than I or anyone else could ever say it. Holberg criticized school doctrines in Christianity, arguing that "Children must be made into men, before they can become Christians"[6][citation needed] and "If one learns Theology, before learning to become a man, one will never become a man."[7][citation needed]

In other words, once a person has been programmed, especially at a young age, it generally becomes impossible for that person to use her faculty that should normally allow her to be able to reflect on a particular situation and to analyze it with the goal to draw her own conclusions and to make up her own mind concerning that situation. And that’s why theists will quote the stupidities found in those books when confronted with an objection to their accustomed way of thinking.

Well I sometimes enjoy quoting bible writings to you, theists, as in the following: To anti-abortion Christians, for instance, I’ll ask as to why their god saved four people from the fires of Sodom and Gomorrah and eight people from the deluge and judged it admissible and acceptable to senselessly and cruelly kill millions of innocent babies and children. It normally takes care of the argument right there and then and, if I stretch my ear a little, I can faintly hear someone mumble: “Fuck, why didn’t we think of that.”

I’m an atheist because I think! Therefore I think because I’m an atheist.

© 2012 Jean-Paul Gosselin

What do you think?


Whether you agree with or have an objection to my blog, leave a comment. I’m open to favorable or unfavorable criticism and what you write might enlighten other readers or myself.


Thank you.



Take this with you.

A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found", the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"

Have a swell day, stay relaxed, have a beer and don’t forget: keep smiling. Life is good. Buena la vida. La vie est belle.